Reading While Under the Influence

Don’t drink and drive, don’t drink and text, don’t drink and phone your ex. However one lesser known hazards of alcohol consumption is reading while under the influence. While enjoying a glass/bottle of wine and reading a good book is not only enjoyable but encouraged by this humble blogger, there is a point when you have to ‘just say no’.
Some symptoms that you are beyond the ability to retain the gloriousness of the book you are trying to read post party: a) the words are swimming in front of you, b) you keep reading you keep reading the same same sentence you keep reading the same sentences over and over again without reading the same.. you get the idea, c) you suddenly and without warning wake up the next morning with a strange book draped over your face. You may or may not remember it’s name.
I confess to having gone down this road a time or two, and I am now traveling around the country visiting schools with a scare tactic power point to bring the message to the kids. It may or may not include pictures of me passed out with a bottle of Petit Verdot in one hand and *shudder* the Twilight Saga in the other. But in all seriousness people, when reading a classic, treat it like a classic. Don’t reduce the magnificence of Brideshead Revisited with your obnoxious poems dedicated to Wah Wah Waugh… it’s just not cool.

And now to completely contradict myself. Alcohol is often called a lubricant, I may have applied said lubricant to help me get through some rather tough reads. *cough *cough Tess! *cough. But hey, it made her tolerable enough to read in bed…. I know I’m getting tacky, sigh. I’d better stop and not insert a ‘that’s what she said’ joke.

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